Friday, March 02, 2012

PR: All-Stars: Light It Up!!

In yet another first--we are reminded ad nauseum that this is "all-stars" and that the challenges have never been done before--this week the designtestants will have to use lights, and technology, in their designs. They must create an avantgarde look using light strips, neon tape, fairy lights--Hello Austin!--and rope lights.
Rope lights? Bondage goes high-tech.
Let's rip.......because I have houseguests coming and need to get to the airport.


MICHAEL
This is the episode where Michael loses his sh*t and goes all bi-polarizing. He cannot decide what to do, but when he does, it will be the winner, because this is the best challenge ever, for it pushes him.
But it's also the worst challenge ever because it pushes him into neon tape and blinking blue lights. I'm envisioning Crime Scene Couture.
Michael buys pink fabric, and stiff felt to make a very structured pink coat. He doesn't do stiff, unless it's his personalty. I jest. No, I don't!
He says he'll push himself, and he does. He pushes himself right away from a pink lighted coat, and does a pink lighted dress, and then switches it up for a black lighted cocktail dress and ends up with a Little Black Light Up dress under a pink coat. Every time we see Michael he pushing a mannequin in a different dress through the workroom. And yet he doesn't send any of those down the runway.
In the end he goes all Ewok-Ninja-Samurai-Warrior-Goddess-Princess. Kenley was right, Michael makes six looks every week. Only this week he gets to use neon tape, which he wraps around her arms, down her legs and onto her shoes.
It's a mess. It looks cool at first, but with each step it becomes crazier and crazier. Isaac liked the idea, not the shabby execution; he felt the neon tape looked like, well, neon tape. And he wasn't keen on the blinking shoulder lights. Georgina agreed and also hated the rope light waist, and the square bow at the back, which made the model look thick; she also used the 'e' word: edit! Angela liked the kooky shoulders, and guest judge Pharrell Williams--who was named one of the best dressed men ever and yet wore a ball cap and a black shirt-- thought it looked like ComicCon, Mortal Kombat, Grace Jones.
And not it a good way.
Michael was spared, however, because......


JERELL
As we all know the edit button, and the mute button, on Jerell do not work. He goes all magnetic lights and fiber optic lights because he's going to do JERELL!! Ethnic meets tribal meets prints.
He buys prints and fringe and feathers at Mood, telling us that he'll mix prints like it's something new. Um, Jerell? Set down the ego and close your mouth for a sec. You've been mixing prints, often hideously, all season long. Just sayin'.
Joanna Coles warns him that his outfit, of magnetic lights and fiber optics, might read Christmas tree, but, as usual Jerell only hears.....blah blah blah. He says it's tribal ethnic, with movement, and he will get his second win. Then he wonders if it's fabulous or fugly, though either would be okay for him. I, however, am leaning toward the latter.
It's Seussical looking, like Whoville Couture. He says it's gotta be memorable. And it is...which isn't always good. It's a hot tribal, ethnic mess. Neon sunglasses and neon shoes and fiber optic hair. An actual light bulb in the model's mouth??! Edit, man, edit!!
Georgina liked that Jerell's dress was the only one that had real movement, but called it tribal raver, and might be found in a tent at 6AQM. Been.There. Isaac actually liked the light in the mouth, but hated the joke store looking neon sunglasses and the neon pumps. Angela hated the long black skirt, as did Pharrell; he asked Jerell to lift it up, and instantly all the judges thought the dress was much better. Better, but too late.
As he was being Auf'd, Jerell was heard repeating that old model mantra, "If only I'd  lifted my skirt before the runway, I might have been a winner."
No tents for Jerell. 


MONDO
As usual, he has no idea what he's going to do because he doesn't sketch. He ;lets the fabric tell him what to do, and this week he let the lights show him the way. He can't think, he can't work, but he reminds us that "it's called a challenge for a reason."
He tells Joanna he's making a little lighted jacket over a dress, but, really, he has no idea. The fabrics, as well as the lights, have yet to speak to him. It seems as if every challenge finds Mondo doing next to nothing on the first day and then busting out brilliance--or, as he says, "grabbing the dress by the balls"--on day two.
He won't just lay the lights over the dress, he'll encase the rope lights into strips of fabric so they shine through the material. His look is simple, and totally Mondo. He seems to have the ability to take every challenge and still stay true to his own style. The colors, while neon and all lit up, are totally Mondo. 
My only complaint is that as soon as I saw it, I got Updated Madonna Cone Bra. And I don't think there's an antibiotic for that. 
Georgina liked the bra, and liked the track lighting, but wished the tracks had a slight curve so the model didn't look so straight up and down. Isaac wondered if it was avantgarde, and called it Teletubbies--though he loves a good Teletubbies dress. Pharrellbreasty card. Angela just thought the breasts looked strange. And, for obvious reasons, I kind of agree.
Mondo gets Middle Ground.


KENLEY
She.Doesn't.Do.Technology.
In the 50s there were no rope lights or neon tape or fiber optics. That's as crazy as sending a man to the moon! And we all know that didn't happen.,....Capricorn One.
With a budget of $300 at the lighting store, Kenley racks up a $700 bill. Cutting corners begins. Lights are tossed out. Rope lights rewound. Magnetic lights returned to the fridge. She's left with Fairy Lights.....Kenley's a gay man?.....and neon tape. But she'll use the tape to make a typical Kenly fabric, only not polka dots, or heart dots this week; she's going plaid! In high volume. A big old plaid ballgown!
I keep picturing Scarlett O'Hara turning Mike and Carol Brady's sofa into a cotillion dress.
And then she does! Kind of. She bought some of that mesh, strap fabric that people use on the bottoms of sofa for support and she'll be making a jacket out of it. Careful audience, Kenly is out of the box.
Well, maybe not too far. Mondo says it's the same style of dress only done with neon tape. And it is, but it's a cool fabric, and the mesh coat is very stiff, but very cool, with the Fairy Lights strung through it. It's totally Kenley but totally different, too. Pharrell likes the shape, but wishes the lights were in the fabric, not strung through it. Isaac calls it divine, and loves that Kenley stepped away from her usual schmata. He loved the hugeness of it, but mainly because you could see through the mesh so it wasn't just a ginormous dress. Georgina loved the proportions and Angela really liked the handmade plaid fabric.
I'll say it, I really thought Kenley should have won, but she goes Second Place.


AUSTIN
Seriously, he goes all fairy on us with his design and his descriptions and his swooshing hands and fluttering eyes and, really odd mustache. His gown will be, and I quote, a "lavish array of lights....atop delicate clouds of tulle...dripping with fairy lights."
Mondo finally realizes that Austin is a Primadonna.
He is instantly drawn to the Fairy Lights....insert joke here__________.......and will do Fairy Princess draped in starlight descending from the heavens as God intended it.
It's a "grand dramatic Stardust Ballgown." 
♫♪ It's Austin ♪♫
"Magical....dazzling....windswept."
Joanna Coles worries it might be too pretty for guest judge, rapper-slash-designer--and why are all rappers becoming fashion designers?--Pharrell Williams, but Austin only cares that it's romantic like Austin. 
♫♪ It's Austin Scarlett ♪♫
So much drama coming through in Austin's work this week, that it's no wonder he gets the home phone call. We find that his mother may be losing her house and that he's doing All-Stars for his family.
Suddenly the Austin Scarlett Musical gets all serious, until.....
♫♪ "This is how God must have felt when he created the heavens" ♪♫ 
Which, I guess, means God is a gay designer with a 1940s villain mustache.
His dress is Gothic Marie Antoinette Starlight Starbright. It's also, mainly because of the shape, like a Christmas tree. Angela wishes the lights had been in the fabric, or under the fabric, not just strung with tinsel and globes around the fabric. Isaac called it ♫mysterious♪ while Pharrell called it ♪beautiful♫ and Georgina said it was ♫enchanting♪.
Austin swooned on the runway, winning this challenge. So thrilled was he that he evidently shaved off that 'stache.
So, it's not just a win for him, it's a win for all of us!


What did you think?
Did the right one win?
Did the right one leave?
And what kind of ♫♪drama♪♫ will ensue next week on the most dramatic season ever!!??!!

6 comments:

  1. Yes, we were wondering Pharrell Williams'bestest clothes were too.

    Jerell - we want to know what tribe this model character belonged to?
    Whoville - snort!

    Mondo - "grabbing the dress by the balls" glrg

    Kenley - well deserved second place.

    Austin - ♫♪ It's Austin Scarlett ♪♫
    LOL!
    The call to his mom had us worried. But when we saw a behind the scenes without the regrettable mustache we knew he'd survive. And we really liked his effort.

    NOW are we ever going to see any of these efforts in their promised venue, Lifetime? Miss Piggy, Hair? some musical artist?

    We survived the after show and all we can tell about next week is some kind of client.

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  2. I loved Kenley's creation! I thought it looked like something Nicki Minaj would wear.

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  3. Anonymous1:35 PM

    I called the judges order and agree with it to a point. I think Mondo should have won because he really made the lights be part of the fabric and not just laid on top of it.

    I also think Mondo's would have been the best to incorporate into a video.

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  4. Anonymous9:04 PM

    I really liked Kenley's design, and the right person went home except he should have left one week ago.

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  5. I watched the aftershow and liked Jerrell a little bit more (just a little bit). Michael was humble but not in a fake way on the aftershow. I still don't like Kenley but I do think that her design was the best (if only for the fabric).

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  6. I'm all about Mondo.

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