Saturday, May 19, 2018

It's Snarkurday!


Too bad his mother isn’t still around to smack some sense into him, because his father is not doing a thing.

Last week, Redmond O’Neal, son of Ryan O’Neal and Farrah Fawcett, was arrested in Santa Monica for robbing a convenience store with a knife and is being held on $50,000 bail and is due in court on Thursday.

According to police, Redmond walked into the store armed with a knife and demanded the clerk to take out money from the register. After grabbing the cash, Redmond fled on foot and was arrested nearby.

Redmond has a long history of drug abuse; in 2011., Ryan said his son was a mess because he “never recovered from the loss of his mother”.But, yeah, Farrah Fawcett died in 2009; Redmond was arrested for possession of coke and meth in 2005, and in 2008 matching vials of meth were found in both Redmond and Ryan’s bedrooms.

In September 2011, Redmond’s probation was revoked after he admitted to using narcotics in court-ordered rehab that was imposed after he pleaded no contest to felony gun possession and heroin possession in August 2011.

In July 2015, Redmond was sentenced to three years in the California Department of Corrections and Rehabilitation but was credited for nearly a year served by his trial judge.

He’s just thirty-three, but Daddy’s still making excuses for him.
Katy Perry must have realized her role as bothersome yappy kid sister on American Idol won’t last forever, and so she’s trying to find a new way back into the press … by offering a literal olive branch to frenemy—former frenemy—Taylor Swift. But Katy also knows that she gets a lot of press over the drama she creates and if she’s gonna play nice with TayTay, she’ll need a new feud to keep her name out there.

And along comes RiRi. Rumor has it their friendship fizzled when Katy started dating Orlando Bloom …again … and the pair hadn’t been seen together for well over a year. It was fueled when Rihanna was asked if she’d watch Katy on American Idol and RiRi said:
“It depends on how bored I am.”
Ouch. Now, cut to the Met Gala and the story that the two women were “forced” to take a picture together on the red carpet, and then, slam of all slams, Katy wasn’t invited to RiRi’s Met Gala after-party.

Ouch; and there’s more tea according to a “source”:
“Rihanna was chairing the Met Gala [and] had to pose with a lot of the celebrity guests but it was really uncomfortable when she was asked to have the photo with Katy. They used to be close but Rihanna’s expression in the photo says it all. Katy was upset about the whole situation because Rihanna was cold to her and she wasn’t invited to her after-party.”
Well, RiRi does look less-than-thrilled to be standing with Katy. Or maybe it’s because one of those bat wings clipped her pope’s hat.

Anyway, Katy, way to end one feud and score another. I’ll begin the countdown until Katy and TayTay start Mean Girling Rihanna. And laughing because Rihanna won’t care.
Back in In March, the police were called twice in 24 hours to Tori Spelling’s house for “domestic” issues. Tori called police the first time, fearing there was a robbery in progress late at night, but it was just her husband Dean sneaking back into the house.

The next morning, Dean called emergency services on Tori, claiming she was flipping out and acting aggressive—a call that was characterized by dispatch as “female mental illness”—though it turns out to have been caused by Tori’s stress of being a mother to her five kids.

And so how does Tori Spelling fix this mess? She wants another baby.

Of course, she’s angling for another “reality” show, so a pregnancy could be seen as more coins in the contract because, you know, when you have no job, no discernible talent, and are married to a deadbeat dad, have a baby for TV.
Oops, Baby Daddy Drama … in the Kardastrophe Klan.

Tim Chung is a member of the LAPD, but also moonlights as a bodyguard to celebrities and was on Kylie Jenner’s security detail for a while, right before she got pregnant. And then rumors started that maybe Tim Chung is the true father of Baby Stormi, and in the way he responded, well, he raised more questions than answers.

Chung took to his Instagram, which has a following of over 735,000, to say:
“I am a very private person and would normally never answer to gossip and stories that are so ridiculous that they are laughable. Out of deep respect for Kylie, Travis, their daughter together and their families, I would like to set the record straight that my interactions with Kylie and her family have been limited in strictly a professional capacity only. There is no story here and I ask that the media no longer include me in any narrative that is incredibly disrespectful to their family.”
I find it odd that this police officer used the very same media that all Kardastrophe’s use to try and quash a rumor. And he has three-quarters of a million followers?

Uh huh.
On May 8th, someone named Pauley Perrette appeared in her final episode on something called NCIS and that’s when the real drama started. Pauley never offered an explanation for why she was leaving the show but now a story has emerged.

Pauley got real on Twitter—cuz that’s where one gets real—and sent out a series of tweets implying she was the victim of multiple physical assaults and a powerful cover-up on the set of the show:
“I refused to go low, that's why I've never told publicly what happened. But there are tabloid articles out there that are telling total lies about me. If you believe them? Please leave me alone. You clearly don't know me.”
And that was followed with:
“Maybe I'm wrong for not ‘spilling the beans’ Telling the story, THE TRUTH. I feel I have to protect my crew, jobs and so many people. But at what cost? I.don't.know. Just know, I'm trying to do the right thing, but maybe silence isn't the right thing about crime. I'm... Just... ?”
And then more passive aggressive gibberish:
“There is a ‘machine' keeping me silent, and feeding FALSE stories about me. A very rich, very powerful publicity ‘machine’. No morals, no obligation to truth, and I'm just left here, reading the lies, trying to protect my crew. Trying to remain calm. He did it.”
And then another hint:
“I've been supporting ant-bullying programs forever. But now I KNOW because it was ME! If it's school or work, that you're required to go to? It's horrifying. I left. Multiple Physical Assaults. I REALLY get it now. Stay safe. Nothing is worth your safety. Tell someone.”
That ‘false story’ she mentions might be the Radar Online story of how she was fired from the show due to a fight with star, and hottie, Mark Harmon. The rumor was that Perrette and Harmon fought like cats and dogs … over his dog; see, ALLEGEDLY, Harmon’s pit-bull rescue bit a crewmember and was barred from the set, but a year later, Harmon was allowed to bring the dog back. Perrette was incensed and refused to work with Harmon—and apparently, they had very few scenes together this past year and almost none together in her last episode—and was ultimately allowed to quit.

CBS issued a vague explanation about something:
“Pauley Perrette had a terrific run on NCIS and we are all going to miss her. Over a year ago, Pauley came to us with a workplace concern. We took the matter seriously and worked with her to find a resolution. We are committed to a safe work environment on all our shows.”
So, who really knows what happened? No one, at least until Perrette starts Tweeting again and this time actually says something.
I’ll give it to That Woman, you know, the head of the Kardastrophe Klan, she knows how to make the coins. I mean, when her daughter’s boyfriend shopped around a sex tape, That Woman used it to get the family a TV show, so she can clearly take any situation and make it a money-maker.

Now, she’s doing press for her partnership with Bumble Bizz, a “networking” offshoot of the dating app, about finding a new minion someone to bone assistant and she spoke to the Huffington Post about it.

But HuffPo was more interested in Kylie Jenner spent an episode of last season’s Keeping Up With The Kardashians thinking an employee was trying to take photos of her before she announced her pregnancy, and how That Woman wanted the person killed maimed fired:
“Unfortunately, there are some bad people out there who have not good intentions. And, you know, I obviously can’t control that. But to the best of my ability, we try to have people on our team who have our back, who we feel that we can really trust.”
See, if anyone was gonna spills the beans about the knocked-up daughter, it would be That Woman, and she would pocket the coins that came from it. She acts almost like a Mark Harmon pit-bull and says she will go after anyone who dares speak the Kardastrophe name to the press …well, anyone who isn’t a Kardastrophe and making a profit from it:
“We obviously will go to and spareno expense to hold somebody accountable if that happens on our team. I don’t care how much money somebody might have ― if they have nothing. Some people think, ‘Oh, I don’t have any money, and they’re not going to sue me.’ Well, we’ll take payments.’ We’ll garner those wages for, you know, the next 10 years. But I just think that people don’t think. It’s a foolish thing to do.”
Who the f**k does she think she is, Don Corleone? I mean, if someone crosses her are they gonna wake up one morning with Kim's old ass in their bed?

Seriously; she’d sue a homeless person if he took a picture of Kylie’s baby bump … or Kim’s inflatable ass …or Khloe’s filled-to-the-brim lips …or That Woman’s cloven hooves and horned tail …or simply went against The Family.

Friday, May 18, 2018

Gay Bashers Face Thirty Years For Hate

Juan Carlos Lopez, Luis M. Alonso Piovet, Adonis Diaz, and Pablo Reinaldo Romo-Figueroa—left to right in the photo—the four thugs accused of attacking a gay couple, Rene Chalarca and Dmitry Logunov, on South Beach will face new, stiffer charges under Florida's hate-crime enhancement law. Each one of the four could face up to 30 years in prison if found guilty.

Good.


The attack occurred last month, during Miami Beach's annual gay-pride parade, when one of the two men accidentally bumped into Juan Carlos Lopez on Ocean Drive. Lopez and his little band of hate-mongering homophobes began shouting, calling the victims "maricones," an anti-gay slur in Spanish. On surveillance video, you see the four repeatedly punching the two gay men in the face, causing cuts and bruises. Helmut Muller, an onlooker, chased the attackers to try and stop them, but he was also attacked and beaten.


A day later, after Miami Beach police released that video of the attack, the four men turned themselves in to police. Under Florida law, aggravated battery is a second-degree felony, punishable by up to 15 years in prison, but if the attack is committed because of someone's sexual orientation, the crime becomes a first-degree felony, punishable by up to 30 years in prison.


And clearly, the homophobic slurs shouted by these four thugs will show it to be a Hate Crime, and hopefully all four will be off the streets for thirty years and live as someone’s bitch in a Florida prison.


We’ve come a long way in the movement, but we’re still being attacked and beaten on the streets of America just for being gay.


That must end. Hate must end.

I Didn't Say It ....


Mo Brooks, a Republican Congressman from Alabama, because of course, on the cause of rising sea levels:

“Every time you have that soil or rock or whatever it is that is deposited into the seas, that forces the sea levels to rise, because now you have less space in those oceans, because the bottom is moving up.”

Brooks then said the California coastline and the White Cliffs of Dover tumble into the sea every year, and that contributes to sea-level rise.
Seriously; a grown-assed, ALLEGEDLY intelligent man, said this.
Damn those White Cliff of Dover for ruining our planet!
Rex Tillerson, former Secretary of State, fired by Tweet, the commencement address today at the Virginia Military Institute:

“If our leaders seek to conceal the truth, or we as people become accepting of alternative realities that are no long grounded in facts, then we as American citizens are on a pathway to relinquishing our freedom. A responsibility of every American citizen to each other is to preserve and protect our freedom by recognizing what truth is and is not, what a fact is and is not. Begin by holding ourselves accountable to truthfulness and demand our pursuit of America’s future be fact-based – not based on wishful thinking, not hoped-for outcomes made in shallow promises – but with a clear-eyed view of the facts as they are, and guided by the truth that will set us free to seek solutions to our most daunting challenges. When we as people, a free people, go wobbly on the truth, even on what may seem the most trivial of matters, we go wobbly on America.”

Huh. I wonder who he might be talking about.
Ryan Murphy, announcing that all profits from his new show on the 1980s New York ballroom scene, Pose, will be donated towards Transgender and LGBTQ communities:

“I am donating 100 percent of my profits from my new FX show POSE towards trans and LGBTQ charitable organizations. These groups do amazing work and need our support. Every day for the next 14 days I will highlight a group I’m supporting, and encourage you to do the same!”

Good for him. Hopefully the show is successful and lots of coins come forth!
Wilbur Ross, Commerce Secretary Wilbur Ross, on the assertion by China, during trade talks, that American beef was tainted with mad cow disease:

“I pointed out to them that both the president and I eat quite a lot of American beef. And other than the fact that we’re in public office, there are no signs of mental instability as a result.”

Sorry, Wilbur, both you and the Fat Bastard are mad as hatters.
And dumb, too.
Andrew Garfield, starring in the Broadway revival of Tony Kushner’s Angels in America, on Miss Vanjie’s now iconic exit from RuPaul’s Drag Race:

“I was so disappointed to see Miss Vanjie go – as everyone was. And that exit is like one of the iconic moments…I believe…of Drag Race history… What the hell was that?  Were you taken over by a divine entity? It’s hypnotized the culture. She was channeling, there was something…Bruce Springsteen and Miss Vanjie, I feel changed by so far this year – maybe Miss Vanjie slightly more profoundly.”

Carlos and I cannot get enough of "Miss Vanjie ... Miss Vanjie ... Miss Vanjie."
We use it all the time!
Deadpool, crashing Stephen Colbert’s Late Show monologue: 

“And President Trump spent the day complaining on Twitter about leaks inside the White House, because we all know Trump prefers his leaks inside of Russian hotel rooms. You get it, Stephen? Because the president watched two Russian prostitutes urinate on a hotel-room mattress?”

Listen to Deadpool.
Jason Statham, apologizing now for his tirade … if he said it:

“Someone approached me claiming to have a tape of me using terms offensive to the LGBTQ community during a conversation I had with my producing partner, on a movie set five years ago. I have never heard the recording and my multiple requests to hear the recording have been refused. I have no recollection of making any of these offensive comments. However, let me be clear, the terms referenced are highly offensive. If I said these words, it was wrong and I deeply apologize. Anyone who knows me knows it doesn’t reflect how I feel about the LGBTQ community. While I cannot fix what was said in the past, I can learn from it and do better in the future.”

This is what ALLEGEDLY said that day:

“Stop acting like a f***ing fag. I hate that faggity f***ing shit. Talking, whispering …you guys are acting like a bunch of f***ing faggots. If you want to tell me something don’t wait till I do 15 f***ing takes before you say something. Stop being a f**king fag and be more assertive…. I just hate that f***ing faggity behaviour f***ing faggity shit… f***ing fags, I just hate that s***.”

I wonder how someone can forget that kind of tirade.
But I hope that if Statham did say these things he’s learned that being a dick doesn’t pay.

Thursday, May 17, 2018

Bobservations


Remember the story of the white woman in Oakland who used the police as her “racism valets” to remove a couple of black men from a park because they were :::gasp::: grilling?

Well, her name Dr. … seriously? … Jennifer Schulte from Stanford University so she is clearly not some stupid ass moron … she’s a doctor.

Well, apparently, a doctor of Racism and White Privilege.

Spread her shame. As I see it, if black people having a barbeque make you uncomfortable, or black people sitting in Starbucks causes you worry, or a black girl sleeping in the common room of her dorm is somehow scary, you have the problem, so maybe you should stay home and leave the world to the rest of us. You’ll be better off, we’ll be better off.

Oh yeah, and don’t forget:

Jennifer Schulte, Racist.
The other morning Carlos, who was in the office reconciling—he pronounces it ‘ree-conciling’ … so cute—came out and asked me:
“Did you make a payment to your AMEX account and forget to enter it into the balance sheet?”
“No. I don’t owe any money to American Express. I never use that card.”
He shows me the bank statement, where a payment was made to American Express in the amount of $230 and on the bank statement, it lists my name Naturally, we both think my account is hacked and I go access my AMEX account online and, yup, no transactions at all, payments or charges, since last fall. I ask Carlos to maybe call AMEX or the bank and see what the trouble might be, but, again, he asks if someone stole my identity and used my card …
“Wait. What? You think someone stole my identity, used my AMEX card to rack up two-hundred bucks in charges, and then paid off the card using our bank account?”
“Yes.”
"Why …. whyyyyyy … would anyone do that?”
But he isn’t listening because he’s spotted another AMEX payment, listed with my name, from the previous month. I look at it and … in the words of the immortal BritBrit, and to paraphrase her greatness …. Oops, he did it again.

The two AMEX payments were from his card, but he accessed the AMEX account on our Google account with was open under my name, you know, because of this here blog and so … the accounts were his, the payments were his.

Of course, I spent the rest of the day asking if he wanted to accuse me of making more nonexistent payments to my accounts. It was fun.
Seriously, there’s nothing going on here, and if you believe that …

Just a day after the Chinese government agreed to put $500,000,000 into an Indonesian project that will personally enrich Donald _____, the Fat Bastard ordered a bailout for a Chinese-government-owned cellphone maker, ZTE:
“President Xi of China, and I, are working together to give massive Chinese phone company, ZTE, a way to get back into business, fast. Too many jobs in China lost. Commerce Department has been instructed to get it done!”
So, he’s not creating jobs in America, but rather creating them in China, because China ponied up a half-billion dollars for a theme park resort outside of Jakarta at which _____’s business has a deal to license the _____ name to the resort, which includes a golf course and hotels.

Like I said, nothing to see here … right, Deplorables?
Brian Morris, from the small town of Clarendon Hills in Dupage County, Illinois, just won $125 million in the state lottery, quit his job and then …. Brian Morris purchased over 20,000 tons of manure, valued at $224,000, and had it delivered to, and dumped on, the home of his former employer.

Morris was standing across the street and laughing when the police arrived, and he rapidly came over to confess his responsibility and explain his motivations.

Lieutenant Frank Meyers, a spokesman of the Clarendon Hills Police Department, said:
“The accused told us he’d worked for the victim for 17 years and was treated like shit. He says he had to endure his mistreatment because he needed the money, but that now that he won $125 million it was time for revenge.”
Morris attracted a lot of media attention after winning $125 million Powerball and when he was asked by organizers what he would do with the money, he said:
“Just read the news, you’ll see.”
Morris was freed on bail about ManureGate and told reporters to “stay alert”, claiming he had “a few other pranks to pull over the next few weeks.”

I.Can’t.Wait.
Georgia Secretary of State and gubernatorial candidate and Republican, because, of course, Brian Kemp is trying to show conservatives he’s a tough guy with a new ad that shows him pumping a shotgun, setting off an explosion, and promising to “round up illegals” in his pick-up truck if need be; in the ad he says:
“I’m so conservative, I blow up government spending. I own guns that no one’s taking away. My chainsaw is ready to rip up some regulations. I got a big truck, just in case I need to round up criminal illegals and take ‘em home myself. Yep, I just said that. I’m Brian Kemp. If you want a politically incorrect conservative, that’s me.”
Kemp made headlines earlier this month by pointing a shotgun at a young man who wanted to date his daughter.

Yup, he’s a gun nut and he wants to be governor of Georgia.
Karma; love her. This week, after someone spilled the beans about _____ hack Kelly Sadler’s vile remarks about John McCain, White House Press Liar, Sarah Huckabee Sanders chastised the White House communications team for leaking those remarks. Now, she didn’t denounce the remarks themselves, just the leaking of the remarks to the press.

So, what does a White House staffer do after that meeting? Well, just what Sanders thought:
“I am sure this conversation is going to leak, too. And that’s just disgusting.”
Um, Sarah, you Melting Lump of Play-Doh, saying of someone who is terminally ill, he’s “dying anyway” is disgusting, but telling the story about someone who said that vile thing is not.

Get your priorities straight and … oh, forget it. Look who I’m talking to …
Remember when ____, while lying and campaigning, announced that he would be the most LGBT friendly president ever?

This week his administration rolled back rules that allowed transgender inmates to use facilities that match their gender identity, including cell blocks and bathrooms.It's just one more reversal of an Obama administration effort to protect transgender prisoners from sexual abuse and assault.

But, hey, if it gets rid of the progress set forth by a real president, and harms only trans folks, then who cares, right?
It’s plain to see that Donald and Melania don’t have that same loving type of marriage that the Obamas had, so who does _____ call on for those late-night chats, mid-morning gab fests, and late day gossip sessions?

Sean Hannity.

On some days, they speak multiple times, with one calling the other to inform him of the latest developments. White House staff know the calls happen, because _____ might enter a room and say:
“I just hung up with Hannity.”
He’s even called Hannity during meeting with staff.

It’s a bromance, and the ugliest one in history.
When Patricia O’Grady moved into the top floor of a Greenwich Village walk-up in 1955, she and her three roommates helped sweep the hallway in exchange for a discounted rent of $16 a month. The unit was bare, no more than floor and walls, so the girls installed a sink and other amenities. While her roommates moved on, O’Grady never left, and stayed in the rent-controlled apartment until she died this past March at the age of 84.

Her monthly rent was $28.43.

In addition to possibly being the cheapest unit in Greenwich Village, tit also may have been New York City’s last cold-water flat since it had neither heat nor hot water., though it did have two working fireplaces.

O’Grady was so set in her ways, she fought with the landlord any time he tried to update the apartment; when he tried to install proper heat, she pleaded with him:
“What you’re doing to me is torturing me. Please leave the apartment as is. I’m at peace.”
The apartment had no bath or shower. There was only a single gas light bulb, and, thanks to her osteoporosis, O’Grady couldn’t replace it and so she used candlelight; a pull-chain toilet and cast-iron stove were updated only recently.

But, again, $28.43 a month.

With O’Grady gone, the landlord will do a renovation and rent Patricia O’Grady’s old apartment for at least $5,000 a month.
As they say on Project Runway …
“One day, you’re in. The next day you’re out.”
And then maybe you can go back in again?

It looks like Project Runway, formerly the darling of Bravo before all those housewives and realtors, is moving back to Bravo from Lifetime, and we can thank the Weinstein Scandal for it.

The PR moved to Lifetime back in 2008 when The Weinstein Company [TWC] decided to make some more coins from a sale of the show. But now, A + E Television Networks, which owns Lifetime, dropped TWC after all the accusations against Harvey Weinstein came out and Heidi and Co. were :::gasp::: homeless.

And that’s when Bravo opened its purse and rolled out the coins the bring the PR home where it all started, and where it belongs.

It was in, it was out, it’s in again.
I love Melissa McCarthy. I think she’s high-larious. Sadly, for me, she keeps making bad film choices that are one-note jokes and sight gags. Her latest film, Life of the Party, s the tale of a woman who after her husband divorces her, decides to go back to college …the same college where her daughter goes.

Apparently, hilarity ensues cuz Mom is at college with her daughter, but …


I liked it better when Rodney Dangerfield played a rich guy, who was worried that his son wouldn’t attend college to Dangerfield signs up as a student, too … at the same college … in Back to School.

And hilarity ensues because Dad is at college with his son.

Remember what I said Tuesday, about how we should let women run things in the country for a while since men have been f**king things up for a couple of centuries?

Well, Tuesday was a good day for women, and Democrats.

More than half of the winning Democratic candidates for House seats in Tuesday’s primary elections were women, and, in the four states that held primary elections — Indiana, North Carolina, Ohio, and West Virginia — 22 out of 40 congressional districts picked women as their Democratic nominees, including eight women of color; women also won 17 of 20 Democratic primary races for open seats.

I’m liking this, a lot.
I have been watching Vida, still, the show on Starz about the two Latina sisters who return home to their mother’s funeral and find out Mama had a lesbian lover.

I’m guessing the show is written by women … or gay men … because there is a fair amount of male nudity in the show; week two gave us the second appearance of Carlos Miranda’s glorious ass, and also introduced us to neighborhood hottie, Tlaloc Medina, played by he-of-the-gorgeous hair, Ramses Jimenez. It also gave us some male frontal nudity from Jackson Davis, who plays Juniper. Jackson was in a scene with his soon-to-be ex-girlfriend where she was, um, well, she was down there and, well, it led to a line of dialogue I never thought I’d hear from a TV show, even a cable show, in which the ex-girlfriend says:
“You waited for me to eat your ass before you dumped me?”
I know. Cable, huh?