Saturday, March 24, 2018

It's Snarkurday!

In the Does Nobody Think Anymore file we have the Snapchat story.

It seems the social media app decided to post an ad that gives you the option of either slapping Rihanna or punching Chris Brown … because battery is fun!

But what’s really fun is that after Snapchat decided to run that ad about slapping Rihanna—the victim of domestic violence back in 2009 at the hands of then boyfriend Chris Brown—their revenue plummeted by 3.6% … or $800 million.

I guess folks decided to slap Snapchat for thinking domestic violence is fun.
I look forward to the day when Beyoncé and Jay-Z realize what idiotic parents they are; it seems the Carters brought little Blue Ivy to the second annual Wearable Art Gala—hosted by Beyoncé’s mother Tina Knowles—and six-year-old Blue Ivy ended up bidding on some artwork.

Yes, a child was given an auction paddle and bid $17,000 on an acyclic painting of Sidney Poitier. Luckily, Jay-Z was able to wrestle the paddle from her hands and allow someone else to purchase the painting.

And although Blue Ivy lost that round, she kept the paddle, and won the next bid when she offered $10,000 for a piece of art crafted of deconstructed law and medical books created by Samuel Levi Jones.

Thanks to Mom and Dad this child thinks $10,000 is nothing, and maybe it is to Mom and Dad but not to a six-year-old who has no concept of a dollar, much less how to earn one and spend one.
Back in November, actor-director Dominick Brascia accused Charlie Sheen of raping Corey Haim on the set of the 1980s film Lucas. Sheen denied the allegations and sued the National Enquirer for publishing Dominick’s story.

Now we learn that Sheen and the Enquirer have settled the lawsuit. Sheen’s lawyers have requested the lawsuit be dismissed with prejudice, which means it cannot be filed in the future, a sign that both parties have struck a deal.

Oddly enough, the deal did not involve money.

Just sayin’, if someone accuses you of rape and you settle, but there’s no apology forthcoming, and no money changing hands …
A few weeks back we discussed the ex-Mister Britney Spears, Kevin Federline, and his request for more child support for their two children. And it appears that BritBrit was none too pleased at giving K-Fed more coins, so her conservator—BritBrit cannot handle her own funds after UmbrellaGate—Papa Spears met with K-Fed and his lawyer, but it did not go easy.

K-Fed asked for his support to be doubled from $40,000 a month to $80,000 monthly—I guess maybe he thinks his kids will be hitting the auction circuit with Blue Ivy—to keep the boys living life at his place like they live life at Mama’s.

Daddy Spears, however, countered with a zero-dollar increase, and then had his team send K-Fed a letter detailing how he should be spend that 40K.

K-Fed was ALLEGEDLY “insulted” at the suggestion, and at the notion that Brit’s people—AKA Papa Spears—ALLEGEDLY threatened to audit K-Fed to see where he was spending the money, and so they countered by informing Team Britney that an audit might show she owes millions in back payments and asked for an income and expense declaration from Britney to see how much she’s making.

Clearly, it’s all about the kids, er, coins, with that family.
Recently we learned from Fred Savage’s TV mom, Alley Mills, that The Wonder Years was cancelled after a costumer accused Savage and his TV brother, Jason Hervey, of sexually and verbally harassing her. The case was settled out of court, but The Wonder Years was still kaput.

And now there’s new story about Savage still behaving like a douche; a woman named Youngjoo Hwang worked in the wardrobe department of Savage’s now-canceled show The Grinder and filed a lawsuit against Fred and Fox, claiming that working with him was akin to being terrorized.

Hwang claims that Savage would :::gasp::: roll his eyes at her and insult her; and she claims she wasn’t the only female crew member Fred harassed. She says he ALLEGEDLY screamed at other female crew members to stop following him even told them not to look at him.

Youngjoo claims that when she was dusting dandruff off Savage’s tuxedo jacket while he was wearing it, he “violently struck” her three times in the arm. She says a producer told her to say nothing about it because what Savage did doesn’t really count as harassment.

Fox investigated Hwang’s claims and found nothing; they couldn’t find one witness to back up her story and didn’t see anything out of the ordinary when looking at footage. 

Fred Savage gave a statement and was really careful when talking about victims coming out against abuse:
“I have been working in the entertainment industry my whole life and have always endeavored to treat everyone on any set I work on respectfully and professionally. While none of the accusations being leveled at me are true, I wholeheartedly support all people who feel they are being mistreated come forward and speak to human resources and those in charge. We have witnessed so much bravery from those speaking out recently, but I will just as boldly protect myself and my family from those seeking to tarnish my good name. I cannot let these people in particular denigrate me while harming the message of thousands of women and others who have suffered and continue to suffer.”
Right now, it’s a She-Said-He-Said, but we’ll have to wait and see …
I guess because daddy f**ks porn stars, Junior decided to f**k a “pop star.”

It appears that Donald _____ Junior, currently being divorced by his wife, was a serial cheater who carried on a long-term affair with singer Aubrey O’Day while she was appearing on the Fat Bastard’s reality show. And all while Junior’s wife was pregnant with one of their spawn.

Shades of Daddy, no?

When Aubrey was on The Celebrity Apprentice in 2011, Junior, an adviser on the show, went after her, telling O’Day that his marriage to Vanessa was over. Aubrey claims she fell hard for Junior, which translates to “I love money” but a source, possibly Eric the Dumb One, says Aubrey really loved Junior and didn’t make a play for coins by trying to sell her story or get a payout from the family’s Adultery Vault.

The affair lasted six months or so, with Aubrey really thinking Junior would leave his wife for her. But, ALLEGEDLY, Vanessa _____ found emails between Junior and Aubrey and put the kibosh on it, and Junior came home with his tail, ALLEGEDLY a very tiny tail, between his legs.  A funnier story is that the Fat Bastard got wind of the affair and told Junior to end it; yes, we’re expected to believe a serial adulterer and pussy grabber and porn star f**ker told his son that adultery was bad.

Another good part is that Aubrey O’Day recorded a song called DJT about the end of a magical love affair with a chinless f**kmonkey who went back to his wife.

Sounds like it should have been a hit.
This is too funny … Lindsay Lohan has a new gig … as the new face of legal directory

Seriously. The star of mean Girls, Parent Trap, and various prisons and rehabs has signed to be’s paid spokesperson for a year.

At least the lawyers will know where to find her, and she’ll be making money to pay them …cuz you know she’ll need a lawyer again real soon.

Friday, March 23, 2018

PR All-St★rs 6 Ep11: Oh My God! It's Nina!!

The Top Five …and all men! I don’t remember the last time we were having an all-one-gender finale. I like it. Alyssa Milano meets the men on the runway and asks them to put their PR experience into words and naturally Anthony sums it up nicely:
“Project Runway is where you find out who you are as a designer, and Project Runway All Stars is where you show who you are as a designer.”
Word. And as soon as that lovely moment passes, Alyssa mentions their special guest this week and the men tremble …as Fabio puts it, he could feel the footsteps of Nina Garcia coming closer and closer.

Nina is tough; Nina can be mean; but Nina just wants the best. Be like Nina. I love me some Nina Garcia!

Oddly enough, though, Nina talks gaming and how it influences music and film, TV and, of course, fashion. Then Alyssa tells the designtestants that they’ll be teaming up with Candy Crush … apparently, it’s a game you play on your phone or something … and brings out Yonna Ingolf, a green-haired Goth designer for Candy Crush, to talk about the game.

Nina then gives them the challenge:  resort looks inspired by a land within the Candy Crush world. They’ll have one day and $200 to make it work, and then Yonna tells them that the winning designer will collaborate with Candy Crush for a fashion design to be featured in the game or sold online or, oh, I don’t know, it’s a video game or something and I just can’t with it.

The designers head to the workroom to play a game of Candy Crush and whomever scores the most points gets first choice of ‘land’ to inspire their resort-wear. It’s all too much for me, games and fashion and candy, so let’s get on with it …
Literally ... I'm guessing
Ken is apparently a master at Candy Crush and beats all the designtestants by 50,000—Fabio—and almost 100,000 points—Poor Edmond, the newbie to the game.

As the winner, Ken gets first choice and picks something called Brûlée Bay, beach resort wear. He explains that his girl will be hosting a party at the Hamptons. He opts for a bold yellow fabric to create a cigarette pant jumpsuit worn under a sarong type flowy top.

Anne Fulenwider is back, reminding the designers that she knows what Nina likes and dislikes. For her part, Anne loves ken’s color choice and his tailoring.

I don’t do movement at all, but I’m trying to push myself… there’s wind, life and breath.

I hate yellow. I love this.

The Beautiful Georgina Chapman™ likes this, and loves the tailored trousers and the riff on a sarong; she called it restrained and effortless.

Nina Garcia says Ken’s look is “juicy” saying the color was everything; she says Ken he nailed it, though the fabric did seem a bit heavy for the beach.

Isaac Mizrahi loves the color and that it was both beach and tailored, but questioned the fabric choice, saying it moved the look away from the beach.

Guest Judge Kelly Osbourne wants the look, but wished the sarong was removable for a ‘Wow’ moment.

Alyssa Milano called it ‘chic beach’ but didn’t think it was anything new.
He sucked at the game and came in dead last … just one more thing he and I have in common other than the fact that we love his guns. As last, Edmond picked got stuck with Marshmallow Mountain Resort and instantly went into ski-wear.

A skin-tight sexy ski outfit.

He wants black with a pop of color but seems to skip color and go basic black. Anne questions both his fabric choice, and his literal; take on mountain resort as ski athletic wear, but he will not budge; she mentions après ski and he doesn’t seem to know what that means.

Big mistake; huge.

I think that easily this look can interchange into something else … on the ski slopes … at night with a heel.

It really should have been tighter because all I’m getting is fur-collared body bag.

The Beautiful Georgina Chapman™ says après ski would have been a better choice because this is athletic wear, not resort wear.

Isaac Mizrahi liked that it wasn’t so tight, but he wasn’t so mad about the fur collar as an afterthought. He also reminds us that you can already by a ski suit anywhere.

Nina Garcia thinks Edmond was tripped up by not having a choice in which ‘land’ he got. She says he didn’t make the best of it, he made the safe of it. This was Edmond not trying.

Kelly Osbourne called it: wetsuit. And she wishes it had been in a brighter color.

Alyssa Milano was thrown by it not being so tight and says the crotch looked a little penis. She does say she likes it, and Kelly asks if she likes it because she likes Edmond and Isaac says, “Yes!”

I, too, like Edmond …a lot … but this isn’t a good look.,.
Stanley gets third place in the Candy crush Contest and he opts for Lemonade Lake Resort. And, as happens with Stanley, he’s planning on making several pieces yet again, with a dress worn over pants, something, he says, he’s never seen on the PR before. Now, I could search this blog or Google and find out he’s wrong, but just my word for it. Someone has done pants udder a dress before …

But no one admits it; even Anne seemed wide-eyed at the mere thought, and suggests he do something a bit more easy and elegant; he suggests a huge scarf and Anne’s head explodes.

Stanley soldiers on, and as Fabio sees his design he says, jokingly, “F**k off, Stanley,” Then Ken pipes up, “Damn, Stanley.” And that’s apparently all Stanley needed to follow his vision.

The movement of the skirt and sleeves are pure perfection.

It is a lot of look…and it’s giving me Faye Dunaway as Joan Crawford in ‘Mommie Dearest.’

The Beautiful Georgina Chapman™ says he did a great job with a heavy fabric, but she has a problem with the trousers’ proportions.

Isaac Mizrahi says there’s something fresh about the look, as part of a collections, but he wishes the print was gone, replaced by a solid color.

Kelly Osbourne claims it’s new and fresh, but then says she wishes the dress was just a blouse, like a blouse and trousers would be “new and fresh”?

Nina Garcia loves the bold volume but says bold volume in sleeves and skirt hem and pants and hair is a bit much.

Alyssa Milano this is her favorite Stanley design from the entire season.
Fabio falls about 50,000 points from the Candy Crush win, so he picks second …and goes for Taffy Tropics Resort look, with a dress, albeit and utterly backless dress, over pants. He was headed toward a color blocked look but switched it up to keep one color on one side and the other color opposite.

He called it something a Brazilian girl would wear on New Year’s Eve to the beach … because it’s Summer in December in Brazil.

Anne thinks it’s too heavy and too hot and hates the pants, but without them it would be a bare-assed mess.

I’m a little torn. All I notice [are] the flaws.

It looks nice from the front, but the bare back just seems off to me.

Alyssa says she loves a onesie and loves the back of his design.

The Beautiful Georgina Chapman™ liked his color story, and that it looked like Fabio; she was a bit shocked at all the pants under dresses moments on the runway. She has nothing to critique, really, though she wishes he’d design clothes like those he wears; both Nina and Isaac say Fabio should do a menswear collection based on his personal style.

Isaac, naturally, says he has some criticisms; the dress seems heavy, like she may topple forward at any moment, and he says the model looks like a prisoner of the garment.

Nina Garcia loved the exuberance of the look but agreed with Isaac about the heavy front.

Kelly Osbourne also loves it but thinks it’s a bit of a heavy fabric.
Anthony is also a Candy Crush Virgin, but he bests Edmond by a hair and gets to skip Marshmallow Mountain and choose Sticky Savannah, a safari resort. Safari is not a word Anthony can say, though he says it’s because “Safari is a stripper’s name in his neighborhood.”

At Mood, he skips all colors and goes for a white eyelet fabric that reminds him of the circles and squares in the game, and yet is breathable on safara sahari safari. Anne also loves the fabric but then complains she has yet to find the perfect safari jacket—oy, such a horror—and hopes Anthony brings it.

I feel absolute pride. I like how polished it is, wearable and easy.

There’s something futuristic clinician about this look to me.

Isaac Mizrahi loves the “naughty” eyelet fabric, though he feels the shorts are kind of moderate, and not at all “swoon worthy.”.

Nina Garcia thinks it would be a trick to put it on, and wishes the back had the same detail as the front, although she’s getting nurse in a sports bra from it.

Kelly Osbourne likes the white, and candy Crush inspired fabric.

The Beautiful Georgina Chapman™ called contemporary, not aspirational; she says it’s “too nothing.”.

Alyssa Milano thinks it looks like an apron.
It was clear from the runway that the winner would be Ken. His design was cool and resort and simple and chic.

Stanley and Fabio are safe, leaving Anthony and Edmond in the Bottom.

Was it the School Nurse who went home, or was it the Morgue Model? Well, I knew before it happened that Edmond was done.

I’ll miss him.

Stanley saying his look is Amal Clooney at Lake Cuomo. Cuomo? Um, it's Como.

Fabio and ken and Stanley are all making a dress over pants and not one changes their design. I thought it might go bad, but there was just enough of a difference to make each look seem different than the next.

Ken’s monster pincushion on his arm was kinda scary.

And I loved Ken teasing Fabio at Mood about their looks:
Fabio: “I’m making a jumpsuit.”
Ken: “I’m making a jumpsuit, too.”
Fabio: “Are you? I’m making a wide-legged jumpsuit.”
Ken: “I am, too.”
Fabio: “Are you really?”
Ken: “Yes.”
Fabio: “Are you color blocking?”
Ken: “Hell, no.”
Fabio: “Okay, then.”
I still remember Ken’s anger issues on his season and am amazed every week at how much he smiles and less angry he is; what ever he did, worked. And he’s far cuter with a smile.

As usual, Anthony scores Lines of the Night, with this one about Edmond:
“Listen, Helen Keller can see that this man is struggling with his scuba suit.”
And this line about Stanley’s look:
“This is, like, a lot of fabric. I don’t understand why the dress wasn’t enough. And there’s a hat! I mean, it’s very intense.”
I loved Anne calling herself The Nina Whisperer.

Well, The Tents. Edmond missed it by thatmuch because it looks like all four remaining men will create a six-look collection next week, though maybe only three will show at Fashion Week. And I’m good with whoever shows and will miss whoever doesn’t.

As for my winner, I’d like to see Fabio bring it, mostly because, like Georgina and Isaac, I love his personal style. Stanley has the chic gene, and Anthony has the Drama Gene and Ken the Tailoring Gene, so whatever happens, I think this will be a good finale.

What did YOU think?

I Didn't Say It ...

Jeff Flake, Arizona’s retiring GOP Senator, on the GOP and _____:

“Never has a party abandoned and fled its principles and deeply held beliefs so quickly as my party did in the face of the nativist juggernaut. If we are going to cloister ourselves in the alternative truth of an erratic leader, if we are going to refuse to live in the world that everyone else lives in and reckon with the daily reality that they face, including the very real anxiety that they feel, then my party might not deserve to lead. As we are discovering and as we will discover for years to come, there is no damage like the damage a president can do.”

I like that Flake is taking on the GOP and _____ by speaking out, but howsabout putting your money where your mouth is and leaving the GOP and taking them on as an independent or a Democrat?
Francesco Mangiacapra, a “marchettaro,” a male prostitute servicing gay men, on why he exposed 40 gay and sexually active priests:

“I released this dossier because I wanted to expose the ‘bad apples,’ not to throw mud at the Catholic Church but to help her get rid of the rot that contaminates the healthy part. The behavior of these priests is, in many cases, the fruit of bad leadership in which priests are allowed to do the opposite of what they preach. This kind of ‘schizophrenic’ morality is typical of the hierarchy. The paradox of my relationship with the clergy is that there is a role reversal in which I am a sinner denouncing the priests who are the supposedly moral leaders but are committing sin. Those priests throw stones from their glass houses and the bishops make sure that all those stone-throwers are never exposed! In my book, and now with this dossier, I demonstrate that there is a real lobby of gay priests, a freemasonry, an underground.”

Every time you expose a religious hypocrite, an angel gets its wings.
Cory Michael Smith, Edward Nygma AKA The Riddler on Gotham, coming out as gay and starring in 1985, a new film that takes place during the first years of the AIDS crisis:

“I’m from Middle America. I’m from Ohio. I’ve been living [in New York] for a while, and there are stretches when I don’t see my family often. Going home and that whole charade is very familiar. The first family dinner after a while. Coming out to a family, the fear of that.  I don’t ever want to insinuate or push that the queer experience is hindered with shame or darkness and depression … But I do think it is important to look at the gay experience in the early ’80s and know that it was overwhelmed by disease. It’s a film that is going back to a moment and telling a very personal story about the pain and suffering that certain people went through. Sometimes I think it’s OK to have a moment of silence and consider what that experience was.”

Lord, I have such a crush on Cory Michael Smith—I loves me some Riddler—and now to know that he’s a big old ‘mo?
Adam Schiff, on the GOP standing by _____:

“I think one of the really sad realizations over the last year is not what kind of a president Donald _____ turns out to be — I think it was all too predictable — but rather, how many members of Congress would be unwilling to stand up to him, and more than that, would be completely willing to carry water for him … I thought there would be more Jeff Flakes, more John McCains, more Bob Corkers — people who would defend our system of checks and balances, would speak out for decency, who would defend the First Amendment.”

It’s the Tribal Hypocrisy Syndrome; some in the GOP, a lot in the GOP, are so happy that the Black Man is out of office, they’ll do anything to keep a racist, misogynistic, lunatic in power.
That’s why we vote them out!
Charles Djou, former GOP Congressman, on leaving the party over _____:

“I can no longer stand with a Republican Party that is led by a man I firmly believe is taking the party of Lincoln in a direction I fundamentally disagree with, and a party that is unwilling to stand up to him. It disturbs me that the Republican Party under President Donald _____ is now defined as a party hostile to immigration.”

Hostile immigration; racism; criminal behavior; treason …the list is long.
But again, why leave? Stay and fight. Stand up for something for God’s sake.
Melania _____, wife of a TwitBully, and campaign bully, and presidential bully, acknowledging criticism of her stance against cyberbullying:

“I’m well aware that people are skeptical of me discussing this topic. I have been criticized for my commitment to tackling this issue and I know that will continue.”

Maybe try something new, and something you’re also familiar with: start a campaign to help wives married to men who sleep with porn stars … or who are Pussy Grabbers?
Better yet, Mel, take a seat and keep quiet.
John McCain, Ariznoa GOP Senator, on _____’s congratulatory phone call to Putin after his election “win”:

“An American president does not lead the Free World by congratulating dictators on winning sham elections. And by doing so with Vladimir Putin, President _____ insulted every Russian citizen who was denied the right to vote in a free and fair election.”

But he had to congratulate Putin because Putin got him elected here.
He’s Putin’s bitch.
Christine Quinn, openly gay former NYC Council Speaker, on openly gay Cynthia Nixon—who supported Quinn’s opponent, Mayor Bill De Blasio for mayor—running for governor of New York:

“It’s a flight of fancy on her part. Cynthia Nixon was opposed to having a qualified lesbian become mayor of New York City. Now she wants to be an unqualified lesbian to be the governor of New York. You have to be qualified and have experience. She isn’t qualified to be the governor.”

Quinn later apologized for palying the lesbian card:

“My point was never to say her sexual orientation — or anybodys — is a negative when they’re running for office."

To me it just seemed like sour grapes for Quinn, since Nixon didpn’t support her; just politics, eh?
Lt. Col. Ralph Peters, on why he’s leaving his post at Fox News:

“Four decades ago, I took an oath as a newly commissioned officer. I swore to ‘support and defend the Constitution,’ and that oath did not expire when I took off my uniform. Today, I feel that Fox News is assaulting our constitutional order and the rule of law, while fostering corrosive and unjustified paranoia among viewers. Over my decade with Fox, I long was proud of the association. Now I am ashamed. In my view, Fox has degenerated from providing a legitimate and much-needed outlet for conservative voices to a mere propaganda machine for a destructive and ethically ruinous administration. When prime-time hosts—who have never served our country in any capacity—dismiss facts and empirical reality to launch profoundly dishonest assaults on the FBI, the Justice Department, the courts, the intelligence community (in which I served), and, not least, a model public servant and genuine war hero such as Robert Mueller—all the while scaremongering with lurid warnings of ‘deep-state’ machinations—I cannot be part of the same organization, even at a remove. To me, Fox News is now wittingly harming our system of government for profit.”

Clearly, Fox News isn’t news. It’s just another arm of the _____ White House; it’s Kellyanne without the hideous make-up; it’s The Mooch without the pinkie ring;it's Sean Spicer without the angry spitting red face it’s Sarah Huckabee Sanders without the shapeshifting face.